Like a damn waterfall.

So Tuesday night I did trivia at Corner Pocket, headed home, and started working on a big zine project. Around 3 am, my nose starts to run. I look down and it's blood. A lot of goddam blood. Grabbed some toilet paper, stopped the flow, and starting deciding whether or not to freak out.

It's winter, so it's dry, and that can cause nose bleeds.
It's not stopping.
I never get nosebleeds.
This is so much blood.
Shit.

I called my mom, but she was asleep. Called one sister, she didn't answer. Called another, she grabbed the phone, said she'd come take me to the ER. She's got two kids, though, and I hated that she was going to lose sleep dealing with me.

Still bleeding.

I cut off my computer and tv. Changed toilet paper. Got the septum ring out of my nose and put it safely aside. The first sister called, announced she was coming to get me. I called the second and told her to go back to bed. She said, "Ha!" and told me to text her as soon as I knew anything.

Still bleeding.

Do you know how hard it is to lace your shoes when you are a fat man holding toilet paper clamped to your nose? Got dressed. Grabbed my hoodie. Locked the door, there's my sister and her boyfriend. Went to the ER.

Still bleeding.

They took my blood pressure, which was on the high end of not good at all. Got me into a room pretty much straightaway. I was pretty freaked out, but the nurse said I wouldn't die. She had on scrubs, so I believed her.

Still bleeding. For the next 3 and a half hours, I held gauze to my nose and swallowed everything I couldn't spit out. Gross, yes? Grosser in person.

Dude, I swallowed so much blood.

As the doc told me afterward, "With pressure and time, every injury stops bleeding. Either it clots of you run out of blood." Funny guy, that doctor. It finally stopped. He took a look, said it was a tiny hole, but my high blood pressure made it gush.

He said, lower your blood pressure. He said, seriously, you don't have insurance. He said, fill out your paperwork, here's a scrip for your bp, go home. Don't pick your nose so hard.

My entire adult life has consisted mostly of red meat and beer. Crap.

Security

"(Delayed sleep-phase disorder)-friendly careers can include security work, work in theater, the entertainment industry, hospitality work in restaurants, hotels or bars, call center work, nursing, emergency medicine, taxi or truck driving, the media, and freelance writing, translation, IT work, or medical transcription."

That's me. Bouncer/walmart greeter/preschool teacher at a local hipster bar. I stand in the lobby at night and sometimes throw people out if they are overcome by strong liquors. The bar closes at two, and around 1:30 I start to be very grateful that the patrons are about to be someone else's worry. Good folks, for the most part, but evil loves last call.

Time change tonight. Fall back, etc. At 2 am it will suddenly be 1 am again, and the staff will probably take a deep breath and maybe a shot and buckle down for the extra hour of hooliganism. It's gay night, so the FSU/Miami game should only have a minor impact in the usual rowdyism, but on the other hand drunken drag queens. Adventure!

Let us go and make our visit.

Today it was hot, damned hot. We marched firmly around the flea market and then washed away the sweat and dust with cold, clear water, thank god. The town is empty, everyone gone home for the summer or to the beach for the holiday or simply pinned in sucking down conditioned air. For the first time in fucked if I know how long, I'm watching the sun go down without the weight of gotta-get-it-done crouching on my shoulders. All my tasks can be safely put off until tomorrow, when the wet slap of summer returns and I have to hide out in my cool cave.

I love night time. Day time has its virtues, it's bright and active, but all the best things happen by moonlight. Grab a cool shower, put on clean clothes, go out in search of adventure. In search of booze and music and laughing women in short skirts. In search of shameful indulgence and one punch fights and I've been kicked out of better bars than this, motherfucker. Anything, everything, because dawn erases the board and lets you start over fresh.

All my friends are out of pocket or wrangling kids or broke or high or already drunk from afternoon birthday parties. No crew for this pirate cruise, I may have to brave it alone. If I can't find a designated driver, it may have to be heel toe, that's how you go, down the street to Midtown and draft beer. There's a good time to be had tonight, and I'm going to find it.